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So Much For The Plan

A little while ago I did some work with a woman whose husband died of a heart attack in his mid-forties. A big surprise to all involved, including him. They have two young boys, so it’s been quite a difficult time. At one point in our work together, she said, “Don’t you wish you knew the plan?”


What a great question. Don’t we all wish we knew the plan? Don’t we all wish there was a “Big Plan” to know? But there isn’t. The plans are all ours.


When this woman first asked the question, it made me think of football. I know that’s a bit strange. Football is coming roaring back this year. And I have to say that I really dislike thinking about football. I dislike just about everything about football. But, I’m married to a man who is a big fan (Go Broncos). It’s an exercise in compromise.


In football, a team gets together in a huddle. In the huddle – they make the plan, then run out on to the field to see what happens. We kind of do that every day. We make plans, huddling with ourselves or with others, then start the day and see what happens. We do it in so many facets of life; make plans and see what happens.


Over the past two years, I’ve made plans four times to see friends in Arizona. We were going to go in November of 2019. That trip got cancelled and I can’t remember why. It was before Covid. Then we planned for March of 2020 (ha ha! said the universe), then November of 2020 (ha ha still); then November of this year ~ which I thought would happen for sure. That trip just got cancelled and I’ve let go of the plan, but am holding the intention.


We all make plans. It’s human nature. Plans help us focus, help us ground things, and help us move forward on the pathway of manifestation. Where we get stuck is in attachment to the plan. And, we almost always forget to put the potential for challenge right in the plan.


We all had plans for 2020. And we really had plans for 2021.


A plan is very much like drawing a map of a hike before you’ve walked it. There might be lake here and some elevation gain there, but you don’t know for sure until you’ve taken the journey.

Especially on the pathway of manifestation, plans are not to be too closely held for validation… it’s really about the That, that which I am manifesting; not the how. If we stay loose; holding the intention and moving forward with a fluid plan; the how often unfolds in surprising ways. Staying loose allows spirit to be involved in the process beyond the expectations (aka limitations) of the human mind.


We are often surprised when things don’t go as planned, which seems very strange, because they almost never do. Some people feel as if they are failing when plans don’t come to fruition. That is amazing, given what plans are: a potential based on incomplete information. That’s all they ever can be, because information about the future is always incomplete in linear time.


The future is not only unknown, it is unknowable. It is unknowable because it is unformed. It’s not a secret; it just isn’t decided. There are multiple potentials until we choose and choose and choose. In our tendency to make plans, we can come to expect that spirit has one too; but it’s just us that does that planning.


Yes, there are intentions of the soul to experience and grow in particular ways over the course of the human journey. There are agreements with others, that are always negotiable, to mutually fulfill those intentions. There are opportunities as individuals and as a collective to create or not, shift or not, choose or not.


But even if it there were a specific plan created by spirit, we are going to run out on the field and see what happens anyway, so it wouldn’t bring the comfort we imagine.


Often the plan, at its core, is a striving for a condition of sameness in surrounding circumstances. If only life could be “just so”. But that’s not the earth experience. What we are really striving for is a condition within; that peace, that ok-ness. We can create an inner condition of peace anytime, because it doesn’t come from circumstances around us, it comes from knowing ourselves to be spiritual beings on the journey of earth.


When we see plans for what they are, we can be open to the unknowable future. We can say; here is the plan, and now I’m going to run out on the field and see what happens – and when I do, I’ll adjust that plan, take a step, adjust again and again and again.


Personally, I am a big planner. I love a plan; whether it’s a plan for dinner, for the future of the Inner Connection Institute, or for what we’ll do when my husband retires. We talk about that a lot; dreaming different dreams, playing with different plans.


When we can have plans, but not be attached to them, we can be in present time, the only time that’s real in earth. In earth, it’s one moment and the next and the next. And in almost every single moment, we have complete control, complete choice about our experience. Not control of what is happening; but control of our engagement with it, our response to whatever is, our relationship with life, and our choice of vibration.


One way to ground an intention with willingness and a fluid plan is with the “mockup” process. A mockup engages spirit to align with an intention. It is like a huddle between you, your higher self, and the all-one consciousness. Check it out in Lesson 5 of our free Meditation For Living program.




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